he stares into the dark fields of nueva ecija, pondering on his little life. in the horizon, the distant lights from a sleepy town meets the magnificient display of stars of that cloudless night. he was on a trip to cabanatuan city, to attend his friend’s wedding. heaven meets earth here, he sighs. nah, for you my friend, heavens meets hell here. a condescending smile forms on his lips. my greatest fear is not hell, i have accepted the fact i probably belong there. it amazes him how he said it, it was so matter-of-factly. hey, go easy on yourself, i might just believe you. allright, it’s not hell. you’re afraid coz you don’t know how to get there. take it from him, marriage is not hell. you can make it feel like heaven. it’s that thin line of lights that blurs in the horizon. as you’ve said, it is where heaven meets earth.

she pants heavily. her hair blown by heavy breaths. too tired to care. she looks into my eyes. i can see her soul. i give her a kiss. i tell her it’s allright. i’m not here to take it. i love you, she says. oh no, careful. be careful with that. im not here to take it. i’m not here to give it. it’s a one-night thing. don’t tie me up. dont cover my eyes. i can’t love you if i can’t see you. sweat runs down her passion-filled body. i wipe it off tenderly. i’m your one night fantasy. tears run down her cheeks in confusion. i’m so sorry, i tell her. it’s my game. i made the rules. i’ll win all the time.

another one bites the dust.

at last, after several years, we’ve had enough of crepes and sisig. we marched down to a quiet and cozy place somewhere in quezon city to do what we do best: talk about ourselves. he got iced coffee, and once again perpetually praised his girl. he got capuccino, dropped 2 teaspoons of sugar into it, and smiled a big-eyed one as he listened to his stories. he got mango shake and survived much ridicule from us. he sinks into deep thought as he sings along with the lady vocalist. she got vodka. downed two shots of it. she still thinks she got it all figured out. and, i, i got my same old san mig light and enjoyed their company. things are changing. he’s shifting into a new career, he’s leaving for the US, he’s in love, she’s drinking, and i, i dont know. im probably changing too. im in the doldrums, the only way is up. yup, things are changing. thank god we have each other.

the lady vocalist gives me a sleepy look. she smiles as she gyrates on the mic stand. i smile back, and whispered loudly. thank you, i said. she smiles back… ahh i’ve found comfort in beer and good music. the beer tells me, she’s telling me, i’ll be allright. and i believe it.

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